Before you become pregnant you are so naïve. Honestly, you just don’t even think that any of those clichés will happen to you, or you think that surely they must just be myths that people make up to scare people off from becoming pregnant.
Erm, nope!! It will happen to you and you’d better believe it. Here are just some of the things I’ve learned during my pregnancy:
- Every twinge and strange feeling will scare the shit out of you. Whether you’ve just found out you’re pregnant and are knicker checking every time you go to the loo or you’re in the third trimester and dealing with Braxton Hicks, every single ache and pain has you wondering “is this normal?”
- You will ask “is this normal?” a billion times and then some more. Pregnancy is a minefield of symptoms, non-symptoms and crazy hormones!
- Unless you have really bad nausea in the first trimester, you will put on weight. There’s no point in trying to avoid it, as long as you are being sensible it’ll come back off again afterwards.
- You will have the urge to BUY ALL THE THINGS. Pregnancy books, baby books, baby stuff, clothes, hospital bag items… etc! You just can’t seem to have enough stuff.
- Random people will ask you every single random detail about your pregnancy and might even touch your bump without permission. What the hell, seriously!
- Something about being faced with a pregnant woman just seems to erase people’s brain to mouth filter! “You’re humongous!!” Why thank you stranger who I’ve never had a conversation with before, that sure makes me feel so good about myself!
- Choosing a name for the baby will become the most agonising decision of your life (unless you already had one picked out beforehand). Suddenly you realise how many people you hate and would never want to name your child after in a million years.
- Your body will do some incredibly strange things. I’m talking excessive bodily fluids, nipples growing at a rate of knots and being ravenously hungry only to feel ridiculously full minutes later.
- You will have to remind yourself that lugging around all this extra weight will be so worth it in the end! Especially if you suffer from swelling, SPD/GPG, heartburn, breathlessness etc…
- Just when you think your bump can’t possibly get any bigger, it does. You will convince yourself that you’re going to be pushing out the Michelin man by the end of your pregnancy.